Write something like this..
I'm a blah yearold blah. I live in blah. I like blah. I hate bla blabla. :P
write a short biogrphy here..
put your wishlist here.. :)
i dont know what to say.
what to do.
or even how to react to this.
upon hearing she's gonna get attached, i only stoned..
posted @ 8:21 PM
what's repressing an emotion?
how does it feel like to repress?
what harm would it do? and what would be left untouched by it?
with input, output is definitely. if one repress what (s)he felt, where would the output be?
on thyself? through self abuse?
or on others who has nothing to do with the matters?
if the harms are so much more greater, then why would one do so?
for the sake of others? so that every single soul in contact with would feel more like being around him/her
or is it that, it's an action out of pure feelings to protect the ones they loved?
with well covered up emotion, few can see, or even realise what's happening inside.
but what if one did, one of the friends round him/her did?
wont it cause more worries and even sadden that individual when all he could do is watch?
by doing that, wont it deviate from the original purpose, making a it twisted deed?
what is supressing a mood then?
what differents does it have with repressing one?
and what are the effects?
if the both have such a thin line in between, then would overly supressing thyself turns into repression?
with collateral damage done to oneself, what would then be the best to do so one would heal instead of immensing deeper?
posted @ 4:51 PM
You are a human shadow. If a loved one needs you,
you are always right at his or her heels! Your
deep social connection with human beings
produces your qualities of genuine caring and
charisma. However, at times you are naive to
the true nature of your loved ones. Remember
that humans' gift of free will does not always
lead them in wise directions. But your essence
of love and friendship represent the other
precious gifts of humanity. Overall you are a
strikingly valuable and innocent being who has
a lot to give.(please rate my quiz cuz it took
me for freaking ever to create)
What Kind of Shadow Are You? (with gorgeous pics) brought to you by Quizilla
posted @ 2:40 PM
but again, who am i to intervene, to know and to comprehend all these things.
posted @ 2:13 PM
i'm still puzzled with lots of things bout crooks.
dont understand. dont comprehend.
would an individual's feelings [feelings in the case of relationship wise] for people of the same and opposite sex be altered if they mix around in crooks?
like i'm straight and take an instant that i'm female, a typical one. then i mix around and hang out with lesbians all the time.
would i, because of the environment, turn to like people of the same sex?
in sociology, human nature can be affected and moulded by the surrounding peers and society. but does it applies here?
if i, still as that female, unconsciously have my label gradually changed because of the people i interact with, then what is the meaning of be a crook?
does the peers really have that power, that ability to twist my label to that extend?
if yes, then i'm sure it can be undone, but how..
that's the question
posted @ 1:30 PM
thinking of her.
missing her.
thinking of her.
thinking of her..
just then was with her.
dont know leh, in the morning i'm like dying, whining.
but after i went to see her, i'm like jumping around, thoughts full of her.
posted @ 7:17 PM
wishlist.
what is it for?
why is it erected?
to decorate?
to let people know what you want?
then why do people like joey puts up a wishlist?
what's the use of one when you want not people to buy what's on it?
posted @ 11:56 AM
forging deeper into the bottomless pit, he tried to be cautious.
but he still slipped and fall face first onto the cold rocky floor
the past seems to be back to haunt him.
for it's the similiar dark, icy abyss that he fell in before.
the one that left him all alone by himself to weep and fear,
to ache and dead alone in.
light was all that he envyed in that pitch-black hole.
emotional attachment creep along the walls like fog on a waking lake.
threatening to suffocate him alive.
he ran and tried to dodge it,
fearing that the past would repeat itself.
it would.. except this time, he wont survive the fall off the cliff..
posted @ 11:47 AM
sweet talking?
what is it?
what's the use it of?
to make promises that they cant keep?
to liar extensively so they could temporarily make themself look good?
then why is it used on people?
when it is not the truth they speak, why do they sweet talk?
even when consciously, they know they're lying. why?!
posted @ 11:19 PM
denyse's out tonite.
at zouk.
she had invitation.
wonder if she's having fun.
wonder if she's thinking of me.
and wonder if she need to sneak out of house to walk her home.
keep wondering, thinking of her..
posted @ 10:58 PM
blog?
what is it?
what is the use then?
a personal online diary?
but how can it be personal when others can access?
what's the real meaning of having a blog?
as a mask?
as an image erected for all to see and think who he is?
even when the real him isnt as projected?
friends around me use an online similiar to this. what does a blog mean to them?
and why are they using one?
a way to let people into your pitifully desolated life?
a method to pass info and put up notices?
or is it just a place used for worded assult in a conflict?
blog?
how can it be useful?
blog...
till we question, we will never know the truth behind the 'truth' that we took for granted.
posted @ 10:44 PM
with the wind you would see, elusive as it would be..
posted @ 11:34 AM
what is childish?
what is the definition of it?
why is one named childish when he act in a child-like manner?
what exactly is the meaning of acting in a child-like manner then?
and what differences does it have with being childish?
can one be in a child-like manner, but, at the same time, not be childish?
what do you call a person who thinks like a matured but act like he's still in his childhood then?
is being in one's childhood a good thing?
and how will it affect people around him? adversely?
in my point of view, if people around him are serious and dull, he'll bring life to the people.
but as always, things can go two ways. by being that, he can be an obstruction to other too.
so is facing both things and pepole in a child-like manner, a good thing?
.
.
.
posted @ 7:50 PM
hao bu rong yi call dao juli to go out, she like also did nothing much. hai~ [inproductive, wasted a day]
wondering if i should tell her i found the water bottle that she wants. or should i buy it and keep it till her birthday?
shit her lah, dont treat me as a friend, i dont care liao lah.
posted @ 7:20 PM
very shagged. not even an ounce of strength suppose me now. towards very late afternoon, me from seragoon flied down to town. met denyse. yeah!!
this is the first time i went around alone with her.
[must record down this day,
15 march 2004 ]
we like strolled from far east to wisma then to cine.
along the way, met her friends and all of them gave me that weird look. hai~
then sent her home. all throughout i'm like having partial withdrawal mood.
maybe is because i'm too thrilled to be next to her.
anyway really enthralled leh. she like so cute can!!
and rather considerate too.
hai~ like low batt liao..
posted @ 10:58 PM
when you're with your friends, you hide. but what bout when you're with people are as selfless as you're and they wished you would be yourself so they can heal you.?
posted @ 11:17 PM
been really in touch with books recently. especially the ones bout philosophy and socrates.
and i've been thinking bout what's discussed in there. it all seems to be real true. though they leave me in a cycle, allowing more questions than answers, but it seems to make me feel more complete. as though i know myself a little more.
just then was at joey's house. downloaded some songs into my mp3 player. on my way back and while i was waiting for the bus, i got hit by mild depression in a form of discouragement.
seeing all those people going zouk on friday night, it reminds me one the time i went monks. friday night and i'm staying home, that was what i thought. you know, i would want to be there. somehow, in there, with the smell of smoke and alcohol, with the deafening beat of the music, i feel like i'm still alive. just like the slicing of the arm, that feeling, as though we finally can sense ourselves. or should i say, numb ourselves, so we can feel the rush of endorphins to mask the pain.
posted @ 12:18 AM
tonite is like totally chilling.
dont know why during days like these i feel something.
something that feels like loneliness... but isnt really it.
looks like this child is far to used to warm, dry and comfy places.
slowly creeping on the floor, the icy air closes in on him. lost is all he could feel.
looking around, he saw none. all is left, is to fear.
posted @ 10:38 PM
oh my god!! just now at tiong saw baobei!! and even sat across her while she chatted to juli for like one hours odd can!! she's like so cute! and man, does she have a personality. oh man. oh man. and she's like so small sized. so cute.
and then her temper is just like how the horoscope described of a sagittarus. so more it's like she's always so full of things to say and is like very fun to be with. oh my god!!
guess why i was at tiong? at home [around 3 odd], after a struggle of where to go and study, i chosed tiong. partly is because i wanted to buy a pen and partly is because.. i dont know. anyway, at tiong bk, i was buying cheesestick when tong came out of no where behind. i'm like totally frozen when i saw her. [shocked till i stun to be exact] and guess what, she smilingly informed me juli is there too. like what the f*ck! so suay can!!
me first thought is taking off. but then, on second thoughts, it's not worth it. guess i'm just too disappointed in her, even if she didnt come over, i would just go on and study. keep everything to myself. then she came over. guess tong told her of my presence. she like came over and chatted. then denyse appeared. i'm like so surprised coz it's speaking of the devil.
hai~ anyway, i dont know but it seems that i'm more and more keen in wanting to know her. hee. but then my personality still only allows me to observe.
didnt think that shyan would go. dint mean to hurt her. feeling really remorseful. guilty too..
posted @ 8:11 PM
domonic's at my house again. trying to repair the internet error thingy. hopefully it'll be solved.
back from the chalet for like not more than four hours. at it, it's all girls and me one boy. first night is crazed man--> off lights, wore lightsticks, made vokha drinks and PARTY!
following day is fun too. made a cancerian friend whom i'm comfortable to be with. warmth is felt too. her name's jasmine. then at night, PARTY again. yeah!! [hey hey! me even got to dance with a hot chick.*grins* nice man, nice!]
throughout my stay and even now at home, i'm like thinking, should i or should i not message denyse. i did once. in the middle of the night. dont know leh. still trying to find out if i really do like her.
posted @ 2:35 PM
ok. i'm out of words. just found out that denyse's staying passive.
a curse ultimately is a curse. no way it will unlock so easily.
what a wishful thinking.
but.. after so much, i still cant figure out. still cant figure out whether it's i assume i like her or i really have a crush on her.
just now was like kou hua hua. said i was thinking bout her. then confused her and left her guessing. *smirks
wonder how's juli.
time and again i asked myself, whether she's worth this friendship.
hai~
posted @ 11:15 PM
came back, did some minor changes to my template.
and made up my indecisive mind..
posted @ 3:19 PM
